Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Single Parenthood

I learned one very important lesson over this past weekend: I was not at all cut out to be a single parent. Will left for SD Wednesday evening and did not return until Sunday. When he told me he was going to go to help his father with moving his grandma (all 103 years of her!) from her assisted living facility to a nursing home, I knew it would be just fine. I was mostly nervous about the nights, since I tend to be a bit of a baby about being home "alone." And, because I know I'm terribly spoiled to have a husband around early in the evening, I made plans that would help me get through the long days.

By Friday, I was actually feeling a bit foolish because I felt like I hadn't really even proved that I could do things all my own. Friends were calling to check in, and I was embarrassed to admit that I'd really only been alone after the kids went to bed. Well, just when I started feeling like I was a baby, everything hit the fan. Friday evening, Ethan started complaining that he did not feel well; shortly after, I discovered that he had a fever. Within the hour, he threw up. Thankfully, this all happened when my sister-in-law was here. Eleanor was in the bath, and Ethan came in looking pretty miserable. Mother's intuition told me he was about to lose his cookies, so I quickly had her switch with me and keep an eye on Eleanor. Seconds later, he threw up, thankfully in the bathroom. I've written before about how anxious I get when my children vomit. Well, multiply that by about a hundred when you know your husband will not be around that night...or for 2 more full days! The night was a disaster, with Ethan up for most of it. I maybe slept 2 hours, intermittently.

Needless to say, that next day was among the longest of my life. It would not have been bad had I not constantly been thinking, if the night is bad again, I'm still on my own. I tried to keep things positive, but Eleanor had started coughing, and both kids were incredibly clingy and cranky. The only saving grace was that I had no qualms about watching cartoons pretty much all day. Fortunately, Saturday night was better, and I woke up Sunday feeling okay because I knew that Will would be home later that day.

That morning, though, when he called from the lake (3.5 hours away), I broke down crying. I knew I was fine, the kids were fine, and that it was not a bit deal, but I was just so overtired and completely spent. Not only was I being demanded physically by my kids ALL day (I'm used to this - my kids have always clung to me), but all the emotional drain was on me as well. I had no one to balance it out with, and that was getting to me.

With Will home, my days and our nights have still been rough (last night was particularly harrowing, with two kids coughing themselves awake), but I've felt ten times better just knowing he's around to offer a little support. Ethan seems to finally be fever free, and the doctor confirmed yesterday that it's not an ear infection. Eleanor seems to be at the worst of it now, with a very runny nose and lots of coughing, but she has remained fever free, so that's good.

The whole experience has me thinking so much about single parents and the strain that is on them at all times. Maybe I am just weak, or lazy, or inept, but I cannot imagine living that way all the time. I thought a lot about the man who lives near us whose wife was hit by a car over a year ago, leaving him to parent a 4 year old and 4 month old. It breaks my heart to think of this man who not only has to deal with the pain of losing his wife but also have to move on while learning to parent completely solo. He has a large support system, but he's still on his own every night, waking when his kids wake, tending their needs all on his own. It makes me feel incredibly fortunate and also like a big baby about my anxiety of my few days on my own. At the very least, I know now that I can do hard (and I use the word hard lightly) things - and survive.

Monday, January 24, 2011

Fun with Video

I've taken a lot of video on my camera lately and wanted to post some of the highlights. First, some stills.

Now that she's really mobile, Eleanor is into everything!
Ethan napped as Spiderman today.
Sledding with Ethan's best bud, Derek.
Derek and Catherine
I wonder who weighs more?
Loving the water.
This is great picture of the wedgie Eleanor had in her bathing suit. It looked pretty uncomfortable.

Floating on her back.


Here's Eleanor doing her dance. She does this bounce whenever music comes on, when one of us walks in the room, or just when she's excited.

Here's Ethan, er, I mean Spiderman. He's been obsessed with his costume lately. And I have to follow him around, wearing a cape and mimicking his every move. He's very quick to correct me if I'm not quite webbing correctly. Fun stuff. Can't wait for doll houses!

I took Ethan sledding today with my friend Catherine and her son, Derek. We had a blast.

Here's Eleanor before her first swimming lesson. I realized that she's 11 months old today. One more month 'til she's one!

Ethan cracks me up in lessons. He is so hyper that I'm not sure how Miss Lauren keeps up. She's so patient with him and genuinely seems to like him a lot.

I love how he just jumps in and goes immediately. And he always tries to jump to the side - he doesn't want anyone to catch him.

Eleanor was having a great time.

She was so great floating on her back. Most kids hate this.

One more for good measure.


Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Milestones, Milestones

I've never been the best record keeper. I've started at least 5 journals, swearing every time that this would be the time that I kept it up. I will have maybe 5 entries within the first couple of months and then at least a year before the next entry. I was never in any doubt, then, that I would be great with baby books for my kids. Both Ethan and Eleanor have them, and they are surely not empty (Will fills them out more often than I), but this blog will serve as the best record I have of these early years. One of my January goals (resolution is too strong a word) is to do better with the blog. I want my posts to really capture our lives right now, as I know this time is so fleeting.

Eleanor is going to be one in a little over a month! I really cannot believe it. I keep thinking she's only 6 months old or so. But the calendar does not lie. As she approaches her first birthday, she's really blossoming every day. Her crawling is now out of control. We really have to be careful to keep doors closed because she will follow us everywhere. Lately, she's been crawling into the kitchen while I'm preparing dinner and playing with the play plastic kitchen. She likes to take toys and put them into the cabinets. She also loves to try and get into the laundry room when we're in the basement, so that door now remains closed as well (which is good thing, anyway, since it's full of Will's clutter). She will follow Ethan around, too, and he loves to play a crawling version of chase with her.

In addition to crawling, she's also starting to pull herself up to standing. She's not very strong yet, but we've seen her do it a few times. I tried to get some video of her pulling up on the train table, but she moves on to other things instead of pulling all the way up. Trust me that she can do it. And, just today, I came into her room to see her sitting in her crib. I had put her down for a morning nap, but there was a whole lot of racket coming through the monitor. Usually, she goes to sleep so easily, so I went to peek at her and found her sitting up. Let me tell you, she was mighty pleased with herself, too. She was literally bouncing up and down on her bottom when she saw me, like "Look at me, Mom! Look what I did?" The thing is, even though she's been able to sit for months, she never goes from her back to sitting because she NEVER rolls. She has rolled before, but never really does it anymore. If she happens to fall back from sitting and is on her back, she'll just lie there. Every once and a while, she'll roll to get to something, but mostly she'll just fuss like a pill bug turned upside down. Well, she must have figured it out today because she was sitting in her crib. I guess I'll have to move the crib mattress down now. Yet another rite of passage. Before I know it, she'll be moving out of the crib and into a big girl bed. Ugh!

On the food front, we're mostly done with baby food. I keep some on hand for when we're eating something I'm not sure she'll eat, but she's been eating what we eat for the last few weeks and eating a lot of different fruits and some veggies, along with all kinds of other foods like cereal bars, real oatmeal, waffles, pancakes, sausage, pasta, etc. I wasn't sure about introducing citrus, but she LOVES all things citrus. Mandarin oranges and grapefruit are her favorites right now. She would eat an entire grapefruit if I let her. This makes for some interesting diapers, but she's not adversely affected in any other way, so I keep giving them to her.

Finally, she got another tooth last week. Her other bottom tooth. All the better to eat with, I suppose, but she's never had a problem with that.

In this picture, you'll see a sippy with formula. I've started giving her one formula feeding a day to get her ready to wean. My goal is to have her weaned by spring break. She's doing better every day.

Another thing growing on Eleanor...her hair! I can know get a bow in her hair without a headband. I keep these with me so that I can pop on in when she's mistaken for a boy.
Will snagged this Pottery Barn kitchen at a school rummage sale last week. It came with a tea set and stainless steel pots and pans. Likely worth around $500. Will paid $40 - for both pieces! Super awesome find, and now we're looking around for the fridge. Someone was selling the matching one on Craigslist, but she wanted way too much for it. It hasn't sold, though, so I'm hoping she comes crawling back to me and wants to sell it.
Here is a tiny preview of the decorations for Eleanor's first birthday party. I'm pretty psyched.
Eleanor in her new kitchen.

I wish I had time to start a food blog, 'cuz I sure do like to take pictures of my meals and talk about food/recipes. This was our dinner last night. Steakhouse filet (Will said they were so good that there was no need to go to Wildfire anymore, but I said let's not get crazy), roasted asparagus, risotto, and an arugula salad dressed with lemon and olive oil.
Yesterday, I took Ethan to Bakers Square to make his own little pie. I guess they do this every once and a while. It was cute. He got to roll out the top, pinch the sides together and then decorate the top with sugar. Then we went home and baked it. I didn't so much care for the pie myself, but it was a fun (and free!) activity.


She loves having access to these pots and pans since mine are behind child locked cabinets!
Almost!

Saturday, January 8, 2011

Legacy

Heaven is a gourmet kitchen. Or, more likely, it's a string of gourmet kitchens. Each one is packed with the best kitchen tools and appliances. The counter space is infinite. And, everything comes in multiples. Double oven? Ha! There's 12 ovens in all Heaven's kitchens. (12 is a very important number in heaven, you know.) Already dirtied one giant stainless steel bowl? No problem. Here's another one. Your chef's knife has raw chicken on it? No need to wash it to chop those onions - here's a clean one. Would it be easier to chop those veggies in a Cuisinart? Here you go! And, when you're done making whatever masterpiece you've created, guess who does the dishes? All the scumbags in Hell, of course! That's right. And their kitchens have no dishwashers , very small sinks, and weak faucets. Sorry, Bernie Madoff - you should have been a better man.


So, where am I going with all this? Anyone that knows me also knows how much I really enjoy cooking. I like it almost as much as I enjoy eating. Almost - let's not get crazy. I think most people enjoy eating meals that others have prepared and that they did not have to work for, and I guess I do, too. But I think I almost get more enjoyment out of eating when I know I created it myself. If you ask Will, he'd probably tell you I get a little too emotional when it comes to cooking and eating. But I just can't help it. Food is the legacy I was left by my mom and grandma, and I hope that food, and enjoyment for it, is the legacy I leave my children as well.

Today, I made the happy mistake of watching a cooking show while hungry. We don't have cable, which means no Food Network. My cooking shows, then, are on PBS. I really enjoy watching Rick Bayless - Mexico One Plate at a Time, Simply Ming, Daisy Cooks, Lidia's Italy. This afternoon, I caught an episode of Lidia's Italy. She was making tagliatelle: a long, flat, wide noodle. She made her dough in her Cuisinart. Then, she had a segment where she was visiting a homemade pasta "fast food" shop in Bologna. These women make everything from scratch, and if you want an order of tortellini for Christmas, you need to order in June! They were adorable, and I was immediately jealous of the difference in food culture between Italians (and, let's face it - the rest of the world) and Americans. The majority of Americans want things quick and easy, which often translates to bad for you and full of preservatives. But that's a topic of another post one day.


What I loved about this little pasta shop was that they were making dough the same way I grew up watching my mom and grandma make dough and the same way I make it today - with a flour volcano filled with eggs. No food processor needed! Just the hands God gave you. The show wasn't over before I knew that we were not having the lemon chicken meal I had planned for tonight. We were having homemade tagliatelle with the while bolognese sauce Lidia was about to make. And that's just what we ate!


I started right when Eleanor went down for a nap and Ethan came home from a trip to the Children's Museum. He wanted to help, which made the process longer, but also more memorable. I love that Ethan, even at only three years old, is not only interested in food but also how it gets to our plates. What better way to get your children to try new foods than to involve them in the making of it? Ethan's always been a pretty decent eater, but he continues to get even better, willing to try many new items. We have a rule that he has to try at least everything on his plate once. If it's something a bit different and he doesn't like it, that's fine, but he has to try it. Often, he tries it and discovers he likes it.


Well, both kids really enjoyed tonight's meal, as did the parents. I had to make a few changes to the bolognese recipe since I only had ground beef and I did not have whole milk or tomato paste. I'm not sure what Lidia's tasted like, but Michelle's was delightful. The recipe for the bolognese is here if you'd like to try it:


http://www.lidiasitaly.com/recipes/detail/944


And you don't need a pasta rolling machine to make the tagliatelle, either. Just a rolling pin and a knife.


I documented the making of it again, just like the ravioli, because I know my in-laws, and my own mom and grandma, enjoyed seeing that post. Ethan's involvement, and both kids' enjoyment of the meal, were added bonuses.


The first few pictures here are of an afternoon this week when we made a couch fort and had a living room picnic with stuffed animals. It had been a long day, and I had to get creative to help the day move along. We all had a blast in the cave and at the picnic.


Eleanor's got a pear.
And now she's passing out cookies to our guests.
Hot cocoa - mmmmm.
Back in the cave.
She has no problem crawling on hardwood anymore, which means I have to be even more diligent about keeping the kitchen floor clean. No easy task these days!
Future Michael Phelps?
Ethan's wearing the apron my mom got for Eleanor in Italy. I didn't tell him it's for a girl. It says "Cooking with Grandma" on it.


Ethan the "helper."

The pasta sheets.
Then you simply roll them up...
...cut them...
...and unroll them. I left them in little piles Lidia called nests. In the top right, there's a pile of the pieces of dough Ethan cut.
The finished product.
No joke, she ate four piles of the pasta. She could not get it in her mouth fast enough, and I had a hard time keeping up.

Ethan's Review


Eleanor's Review

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Numero Dos

Well, Christmas is officially over for the Meuer family...until next year that is. We spent a lovely day at Will's parent's house this past Saturday (New Year's Day), celebrating Christmas. The kids were all really good (Ethan has gotten much better around Jake - he used to not play very well with him), and it was a lot of fun to do another celebration. Here are the highlights:

She can even crawl on hardwood now!
Pop Pop and the boys
Gram and gals
Best family picture
Hammond and Courtney and fam
Fun to see the girls playing together - they would take things away from each other.
Present time!
Eleanor and her new Jack in the Box.
Laura and Chris posing with the very cleverly wrapped body pillow for (pregnant!) Laura.

Enjoying the circle of neglect.
This is a few days ago. I got Ethan some goggles for swimming. There were three in the package (gotta love Costco), and he chose the pink ones. I think he looks like Bono here.
Eleanor's modeling the new outfit she got from A. Laura and U. Chris.
Yeah...she's really getting around now!
This picture will likely be made into an LT Reads! poster at LT. The principal asked Will if we could get a picture of the kids reading. I love this!

Friday, December 31, 2010

Christmas Numero Uno

We had a really wonderful holiday. It was relatively stress free, and I think we just really enjoyed ourselves a lot. Christmas Eve was at my parent's house, which I like the best, and we had our usual feast of pasta. This year it was lasagna with all the fixings (meatballs, sausage, Brucie, caesar salad). Yum! The kids did really well all night, and I even was able to put Eleanor down to bed then wake her up before we left. It didn't faze her much.

Ethan, after staying up until about 10:30, slept in for us until 7 and then seemed to not even realize it was Christmas, asking to go downstairs and watch a cartoon. We were glad because then we could just wait for Eleanor to wake up. Once she was up, fed, and changed, we called Ethan upstairs to see what Santa brought. He was pretty pumped, and it took him well over an hour to open his many presents. Will got a lot, but all small things, and he loved everything so much he would play with them for a while before getting interested in another present. It was really fun to watch. We had a pretty leisurely morning and then went to Mass at 11am. Both kids were good there, though Eleanor was a bit difficult to hold the whole time and was getting antsy by the end.

When we were home from church, I got the turkey ready to go in the oven and then both our sets of parents came over. Since I had prepped most of the food a couple days before, I didn't have to start really cooking until about 4, and then it was pretty simple stuff. I was really enjoying entertaining the family. Dinner was delicious, I think, and we all stuffed ourselves and then enjoyed the rest of the evening.

I cannot tell you how fun it was to have all of Christmas Day at our house. I know we're very lucky to only have to travel locally, and I really don't mind it, but it was a nice break this year to have the whole day at home. No rushing! And, now we get to have Christmas #2 tomorrow, on New Year's Day. Laura Elizabeth spent Christmas this year in Superior, with Chris's family, which is why we are celebrating late. I like that it gives us more to look forward to, especially since Christmas always comes and goes so quickly.

Many times throughout Will's two week break, I have taken mental snapshots of my little family and said a quick prayer of thanks to God for our blessings. We have the cutest kids on the planet (in my unbiased opinion), and we have a lot of fun together. Hope everyone had as blessed a Christmas as we did!


Before everyone else got to my mom's.
Our best family picture (yes, Grinch is in the family).


Auntie Nancy with the baby. She made Eleanor's stocking, so now we all match.
Sisters - the one with Malia is on Lisa's camera. I know we took one!
I love my cousin Amy!

Eleanor liked lasagna - well, or whatever I was feeding her.
Table one.
The cook - mom!
Table 2 (1)
Table 2 (2) Table 3 was the kitchen table with Lisa's and my families (i.e. the kids table).
The annual cousins picture, this one with spouses, kids, and grandma.
And just the cousins. Can't believe how big (literally for some!) they're getting.
Eleanor got to open some presents before going to bed.
I guess she likes it.
Our tree before bed on Christmas Eve. This was my year of "green" wrapping. I used white easel paper (one roll for all presents, and I still have some left) and saved all my pretty ribbon. I thought the presents were really pretty!
Our stockings, all homemade by Auntie Nancy. I love, love, love that we have these.
Our nativity with the rope Ethan fashioned to it in case anyone needed to climb up to the top. You never know...



The cook - my first time hosting Christmas Dinner. We started small with just our parents.
My table. I used snowflake ornaments Ethan and I made as place cards.
Mom helped in the kitchen.
A great looking turkey, if I do say so myself. The menu was turkey (I brined it for the first time), bacon and apple stuffing, green beans with toasted almonds and caramelized onions, mashed potatoes, and fresh cranberries. It was all pretty good, and I was happy that I timed the meal just right. I did all my prep two days before, too, making that day very easy in the kitchen.

Pop Pop Bill and Grandma chat after dinner while we try to get a very hyper Ethan to bed.
You can see by my belly how tasty dinner was. ;)
At the Field Museum, following a failed trip to the Aquarium. Line was very long (outside in the cold), so we left. Field Museum is not as fun as the Aquarium, but we made the most of it.
Eating lunch at the FM.
Cutest polar bear around.
Ethan insisted on stretching with Will yesterday. Too funny.
Happy New Year!