On the Eve of Kindergarten

My dear little Eleanor,

Tomorrow is your first day of Kindergarten. And you are going for a full day. You will be in the first group of students at Seventh Avenue in a full day Kindergarten, something that is happening in more and more schools right now. Looking back at my letter to Ethan before his first day in Kindergarten, I realize that I am not feeling as sad this time around, and I think there are a few reasons for this:

1. We are exceedingly busier these days, and I don’t have as much time to devote to sentimentality.

2. I have seen what fun it is to have Ethan learning and growing in school, and I’m anxious to see it for you as well.

3. You have been excessively whiny lately.

4. I am in denial.

5. I have a lot of projects around the house to get done!

Number four is likely the most accurate. This is not only a big transition for you, but for me as well. For the first time in 8+ years, I will not have at least one child home with me for the better part of the day. This is huge. I will no longer have a little buddy with me on errands, shopping trips, outings, et cetera. And while the reality of this is somewhat exciting, it makes me a bit sad as well. Truly, it is the end of an era. In the quite near future, I will be back to working outside the home, and I will be turning in my stay (and work) at home mom card. It has been an amazing blessing to be home for these years of your life, and I can’t help but be sad that the end is near.

It also is a clear indication that you both are growing up. Tonight, as I put you to bed, you had a lot of anxiety about being around any “big kids” tomorrow. You kept asking about it. I told you about how Ethan had a 6^th grade Buddy his first year at school and that now that Buddy is a student in Daddy’s history class at LT. She knows this kid’s little sister, Mariah, and wanted to tell her. I said, well, Mariah is not at Seventh anymore either. She is in middle school and soon she will be in high school, just like eventually you and Ethan will be in high school. You laughed and said, verbatim, “Ethan in high school? Now that I can’t imagine!” Me neither, kid. Me neither. But 5 years ago, your first day of Kindergarten seemed eons off, too.

While your biggest worry seems to be a fear of the big kids, mine is that you will not eat enough every day. You are, quite possibly, the slowest eater. You always say that you are 100% Italian, and while I know this to be false, you sure to eat like a European: you savor your meals.  In keeping with this idea, your lunch tomorrow is very European: salami, baby cheese wheels, pistachio nuts, and strawberries. I’m hopeful that small bits of finger food (with a lot of protein) will be the best bet for you. Hopefully, you won’t spend your whole lunch talking, instead of eating.

I do feel like you are ready and will do well with a full day of Kindergarten. I’m hopeful a full day program will allow for more play in the midst of new Common Core (education reform of the minute) responsibilities. While you are independent, you do play well with others, and I hope this continues. You will have your best friend Jason in class, but I am confident you will make new friends as well. Just like your brother, I teach you to always be nice to everyone and never exclude new friends who want to play.

You have always been a pretty independent kid, and you can play on your own for hours. Most often, I find you in your room, “reading” book after book. While you do not show much interest in learning to read on your own (at least with me), your love of books is just as big as it was for Ethan. You have a children’s Bible that you have “read” at least 100 times. In fact, on one of our trips to the lake this summer, you read the Bible to yourself for over an hour of the drive. I am excited to watch you go from a book page turner to a bona fide reader, just like your brother, because I know you will read as voraciously as him, opening up so many new worlds and ideas. It does this English teacher mommy good to see you two loving reading so much.

Imaginative play is another specialty. One of my biggest joys comes from listening to you spin stories with pretty much anything, whether it be your dolls, super hero figures, Lego characters, or, like this past weekend, tiny shells. On our family canoe trip, you collected about 30 tiny conch shells. On the drive someplace, you sat with them in a hat and made up the longest, most intricate story about what they were doing. At one point, I had daddy turn down the radio so that we could just listen to you because it is so darn cute. One time, on a 12 hour drive home from Hilton Head, you played with a Wet Wipe for a full hour. You don’t take much to entertain yourself, and it’s fantastic! This creativity will be put to use in school, hopefully, as you navigate new territory.

Eleanor, I love you so fiercely that sometimes I need to just kiss your face repeatedly. Your goofy personality paired with your sassy attitude is a lethal combination. I see so many great things for you in your future. And I will be in the front row watching, and cheering, all the way.

Love you,

Mommy

P.S. I am on the substitute list for your school this year. If I ever get to sub for your class, I hope you will call me Mrs. Mommy!

On the Eve of Third Grade (posted two nights late...)

Dear Ethan,

Tomorrow you start the 3^rd Grade! The middle: three years before third grade, three years after third grade. Wild.

You seemed to have a really great second grade year, and I am so grateful for that. After struggling slightly with your reading fluency in first grade, we really kicked things into high gear, and you improved so quickly. Your second grade teacher couldn’t believe you had any trouble whatsoever, and you were one of the strongest readers in the class. And you continued to work hard to come out of your shy shell, even rocking a narrator part in a school performance!

Your interests right now are mostly the same as last year: Legos, drawing, reading, and creating stories. Your Lego collection is getting slightly out of control, but you really do play with them all and enjoy them so much. You are careful to keep them together and organized, too. You don’t love to write, as evidenced by the big fuss you put up every time we tried to get you to journal over the summer, but you do love to illustrate. You have read the entire Diary of a Wimpy Kid series (some books several times), and you always want to draw and write if you have to write, just like the protagonist in the book, Greg Hefley. You created a character with some friends at school last year called Iron Pigeon, and you wrote several stories for him. Wherever you go, you leave your Pigeon mark, based on the Pigeon from the Mo Willem’s stories. It’s pretty funny how you incorporate him into drawings all the time.

I continue to be proud of your treatment of others, as you seem like a genuinely nice kid. You are upset, at times, by the way friends treat you, though I notice you do not treat them back in the same way. We are working on ways to express yourself better when you feel wronged, rather than simply shying away from the conflict—a skill that is certainly difficult to teach, especially for this pushover mom. You are a likable kid and have a variety of friends at school, not just those you’ve known for a long time.

Your treatment of Eleanor is still great most of the time, but we have surely noticed you figuring out how to push her buttons and manipulate her, and we are working on this as well. But the other day, when Eleanor was trying to get you to let her do something with you, she begged, “Please! I’ll be your best friend!” You paused a minute and replied, “Well, you already are.” I said, “Really?” And you said, “Kind of...” And my heart burst in a million pieces. Most of the time when you have conflicts, really, it’s because you are trying to get her to play with you or go along with something and she is uninterested. Then you get angry and take it out on her. But when you play well together, it is awesome! Just this week, you started a little morning tradition of climbing into Eleanor’s bed and reading Captain Underpants to her. It’s so flipping adorable! We got secret video of it, too, so you can’t deny it later.

You are still doing lots of activities, and soon you will start soccer and fall baseball. Daddy continues to “make” you practice with him, and you continue to whine and cry about it until you are actually outside doing it and, miraculously, enjoying it. We wish you would go with Dad more willingly and appreciate this time he spends with you, but I also know you will look back fondly on the time Dad spent with you working on throwing, catching, etc.

My hopes for you this year is that you continue to be a kind kid, one who is not exclusive of others, and that you work to the best of your potential. You can get a bit lazy when it comes to homework, and while we do not expect perfection, we do want you to always try your hardest. We know you will continue to make us proud.

I love you so much, bud!

Mommy

Addendum: It is two nights later, and I just read Harry Potter with you before bed. When I turned out the light, I talked about how you need to really be the best big brother and help show Eleanor around the school. I told you if you saw her during the day to be sure and wave and smile at her and help her if she ever seems upset. I could hear the smile in your voice as you said, “Sounds good.” I can tell how happy you are to have Eleanor become a part of your great school.